I was once called “The Boozy Beyonce of Hanwell”.
I LOVE Beyonce a lot so I’m channeling my inner Sasha Fierce and writing this post because it’s important to speak up and stand up for what you believe in.
If you don’t know already, I’m just a crazy lady who decided to jack in her well-carved marketing career of 14+ years to open up a little community focused micropub. Every community has a culture and although I’ve never explicitly shouted about the culture of The Dodo Micropub most of you have understood that as a business it stands for openness, communication and good vibes only!
We are living in a time where social injustice is a hot topic and a sad, sad reality. One of those layers of social injustice is sexism.
Sexism in the beer industry and sexism in general is an on-going debate at the moment. I stand 100% with my beery sisters that are fighting the good fight on a much more epic scale than I am. I am just ranting and probably not going to be ranting very well.
If you want more eloquent and significant examples of ladies shining a spotlight on humanity in hospitality and sexism in beer then you need to read this thought provoking and damn fine article from Melissa Cole. Or become very familiar with Jaega Wise and all she’s doing in the beer industry to shout down sexism.
Real life examples of conversations not to have in a pub
Here are some real life examples of actual conversations that have been had in The Dodo with female members of the team. We are not always busy, I often work alone, as do my team on occasion, so these discussions are sometimes intensified because they are had 1 on 1 on a quiet Tuesday afternoon …
Patron – “You obviously don’t drink beer so it’s your partner that does the beer selection?”
Team Dodo – “I do drink beer, I order and choose the beer, it’s like being a kid in a candy shop!”
Patron – “But you don’t drink beer, do you?”
Team Dodo – “Yes, I do”
Patron - “But you don’t drink a lot of beer, do you?”
Patron – “Could I pay for those cans I drank?” *looking at the chest of female staff*
“Not those cans of course!” *guffaw*
Patron – “What is your favourite beer? *said in over the top sexualised grunty way*
“Y’know what I meean, the best beeeeeer youuuuuu’ve everrrrr haaaaaaad?”
Patron – “It would be nice to have a few TVs with the sport on though”
Team Dodo – “It’s not really the micropub ethos. Micropubs are about encouraging conversations amongst community, getting people to come together”
Patron – “That’s clearly just woman talk for you don’t like football!”
Patron – “Women are trying to take over though. Men and women can’t be equal because men are physically stronger. Men are the front liners, not the women. I think it’s political correctness gone mad! They’ve taken it too far, you know the snowflakes!”
Team Dodo – *losing her cool* “Women aren’t trying to take over, we are just trying to create a more equal playing field. Being politically correct is not a bad thing to be mocked!! Without political correctness we’d still be asking black people to sit on the other side of the bus. Slavery would still be a thing! I would not be here as an Asian woman!! I’m not listening to this!!!”
Patron – Thinking it would be a good story to share, one chap spoke animatedly about the time he went to a European city and had a whale of a time because he ended up spending the night watching non-stop porn with 10 other men which was great! Seriously?!? Cool story bro (not).
In case you haven’t realised, I’m going to put it out there and set the record straight. These are most definitely conversations not to have in a pub, especially a female run pub, especially when it is sometimes just you and a female in quite an intimate space and they’re just trying to do their job.
I’m highlighting these real life conversation clangers because I know they are being had in lots of other beer environments outside of our little corner of West London. For our handful of bad experiences (and the good always out weigh the bad) there are hundreds of other bad experiences taking place up and down the country and it’s absolutely not on!!
We hear you, we have to listen to you but we want you to stop please!
Kindness and good intentions, bring those in to The Dodo with you always otherwise you are drinking in the wrong pub. Think before you speak!! If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. Be more aware of your words and the affect they could be having on others.
If I, as a usually very chilled, not phased by much kind of person am flapping about and losing my shit over a conversation (which doesn’t happen often – thankfully) then read the situation and don’t continue to push it. Part of enjoying a community pub is taking responsibility for your own actions. Care a bit more, try harder to say something nice. Keep it clean because not everyone wants to hear your sexual predatory views on page 3 models or your experience with prostitution!
Yes banter and fun is fine but when you are being obnoxious and we’ve asked you to nip it in the bud, respect that and move on. Otherwise you will be asked to move on.
You don’t need to prove anything when you come to The Dodo so why waste that energy?
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again but it’s people who make The Dodo what it is, not me. Everyone who comes through our door whether you are a regular or not, so please, I’m asking kindly and openly, really, try not to be a dick!!
Thank you for reading on if you’ve got this far!